I am moving in a matter of weeks. I won’t get to see this garden in its grown state. And I certainly will not be back to see if the landlord keeps it up (he’s not around that often). 
But there is a great deal of pleasure in settling the pinks and 
columbines and geraniums into their soft brown beds. I’d like them to bloom before I leave, but I don’t need to – the blooms in my imagination will be glorious.
I will water them and fuss over them because I can. 
And I spent ages cleaning the dirt from under my fingernails – and realized that it is a muc
h healthier dirt than that which I have been slowly shucking off for the past months



polepole “slowly, gently, softly, quietly; be calm, take it quietly, don’t excite yourself, never mind”: slowly; take it easy [< Swahili].

It’s taken me almost a month to really process this – I am simply not finished, not ready, not prepared to go back out into the world.

I had hoped that I might soon be looking at changing this blog to “Collar and Camera,” but the collar eludes me still.